The Art of Cultivating Spaciousness

As December unfolds, I notice a familiar tension in the air—a blend of year-end deadlines, holiday preparations, and the inner pressure to wrap up unfinished goals. If you’re anything like me, you might find yourself juggling the same questions: How can I manage my time better? Why does my body feel so tired despite my efforts to stay healthy? Why do I always feel like there’s not enough time?

These are struggles I’ve experienced deeply myself—burnout from doing too much, the constant battle to prioritize self-care, and the guilt of falling behind on my own routines as I try to hit goals in my work and create the life that brings me joy. Over time, I’ve realized that the answer isn’t to push harder but to embrace a radically different approach: cultivating spaciousness.

Inspired by the Japanese concept of 余裕 (yoyū), I’ve learned that by creating physical, mental, and emotional space in our lives, we can approach challenges with clarity, ease, and resilience. Whether through gentle self-massage, clearing clutter, or building small rituals of calm, these practices have been transformative for me—and they can be for you too.

This blog post is my invitation for you to reflect on how you can integrate spaciousness into your life and discover the profound difference it can make in your well-being.

Table of Contents

  1. The Wisdom of Yoyū: A Japanese Approach to Spaciousness

  2. Lessons from Other Cultures on Spaciousness

    • Danish hygge, Chinese 从容, and minimalist practices

  3. Why Spaciousness Matters: A Personal Reflection

    • Overcoming time pressure and learning to pause

    • How I integrate yoyū into my daily life

  4. The Practice of Imperfect Spaciousness

    • Small, actionable steps to create more space in your day

  5. The Body-Mind Connection in Creating Yoyū

    • How physical tension reflects mental stress

    • Using self-massage to release and reset

  6. Decluttering for Mental Clarity

    • Parallels between physical and emotional clutter

    • Marie Kondo meets Lymphatic Self-Massage

  7. Practical Ways to Create Spaciousness

    • Gentle self-massage as a starting point

    • Simple rituals to anchor your daily life

  8. Conclusion: Embracing Spaciousness as a Way of Being

    • A reminder that small, intentional acts lead to profound shifts

The Wisdom of Yoyū

In Japanese, 余裕 (yoyū) is written with two characters that tell a story of abundance. 余 (yo) speaks of surplus—not of material things, but of space, time, and attention. 裕 (yū) carries the essence of ease and richness—a generosity of spirit that flows naturally when we're not compressed by urgency.

This concept emerges from a cultural understanding where emptiness is not void but vital. It's like the white space in traditional Japanese paintings, the carefully placed pauses in a tea ceremony, or the intentionally empty alcove (tokonoma) in a traditional room. These spaces were purposely created to allow for breathing room and to be savoured.

A Cultural Tapestry of Space

This wisdom echoes across cultures, each offering its own perspective on the art of spaciousness. The Danish practice of hygge creates intentional pockets of comfort and connection. Chinese philosophy speaks of 从容 (cōngróng), describing the state of moving through life with unhurried grace. Even modern minimalism, in its own way, points to this truth: that there's profound richness in having room to breathe.

Here's where I need to make a confession: I'm probably the least likely person to write about spaciousness. My friends have lovingly (I hope!) dubbed me a 'time optimist'—that eternally hopeful soul who genuinely believes a 30-minute commute will take 15 minutes if all the bus connections line up perfectly and if traffic flows smoother than has been calculated in Google Maps. I'm the person calculating train connections down to the minute, convinced that today (and everyday), everything will align perfectly.

But perhaps this is exactly why I'm drawn to yoyū. We often seek what we need most. My journey with spaciousness isn't about achieving perfect timing or zen-like calm (though wouldn't that be nice?). It's about learning to create small pockets of peace within my natural rhythm.

The Practice of Imperfect Spaciousness

What I'm discovering is that yoyū isn't about dramatic life overhauls or maintaining constant serenity. It's about weaving small moments of spaciousness into the fabric of daily life. When I catch myself rushing, instead of falling into familiar patterns of self-criticism, I try to see it as an invitation to practice.

Some days, that practice looks like:

  • Intentionally leaving empty spaces in my calendar—resisting the urge to fill every moment with activity

  • Choosing the longer route home, not just to increase my step count, but to give myself the gift of some unstructured time outdoors where I can rest and be at ease with nature

  • Creating small rituals of presence—putting my phone away while preparing tea, treating each cup of tea as a mini ceremony

  • Bookending my days with gratitude, giving myself a few moments in the morning and evening to simply appreciate life

Finding Your Own Rhythm

The beauty of yoyū is that it looks different for everyone. It's not about following a prescribed set of rules but about discovering what spaciousness means in your own life. Perhaps it's the pause between meetings where you actually take a full breath. Maybe it's the decision to leave early for appointments, transforming rushing into strolling. Or it could be as simple as leaving one corner of your home deliberately empty, creating a visual reminder to slow down.

When Physical Space Creates Mental Freedom

There's a fascinating relationship between our physical surroundings and our inner landscape. Marie Kondo touched on something profound when she sparked a global decluttering movement—it wasn't just about tidying spaces, but about how physical clearing creates mental clarity. When we clear our surfaces, we often find we're clearing our minds as well.

This reminds me so much of what I've discovered through lymphatic self-massage in my lilynage practice. Just as decluttering removes stagnant items from our space, gentle self-massage helps move stagnant lymph fluid in our bodies. Both practices are about creating flow, about making space for what serves us better.

Think about how you feel when you walk into a cluttered room versus a clean, spacious one. Your shoulders might tense in the cluttered space, your breathing might become shallow. But in the spacious room, you naturally breathe deeper. Your mind feels clearer. This is yoyū in action—the physical space creating mental spaciousness.

The Body-Mind Connection in Creating Yoyū

In my practice of lymphatic self-massage, I've observed this beautiful parallel:

  • When we release physical tension in our bodies, mental tension often reduces

  • As we create space in our tissues through gentle massage, we often find more spaciousness in our thoughts

  • The act of touching our body with intention and care naturally slows down our rushing minds

This isn't just anecdotal—research shows that our physical environment and body state directly influence our mental state. When we create order in our external world, whether through tidying our space or caring for our body, we're actually creating neural pathways for calm and clarity.

The Ripple Effect of Spaciousness

What starts as physical clearing—be it through KonMari tidying or self-massage—often creates a ripple effect:

  • A tidy desk leads to clearer thinking

  • A decluttered closet helps simplify decision-making

  • A tension-free body allows for more peaceful thoughts

  • A slimmer, lighter body allows for better energy and intentional movement

  • A well-circulated lymphatic system supports better emotional balance

This is perhaps why both Marie Kondo's method and body care practices like the Lilynage method of deep lymphatic massage can resonate so deeply with people worldwide. They're not just about the physical results—they're about creating space for joy, clarity, and presence in our lives.

Creating Your Sanctuary of Spaciousness

Consider how you might create this harmony of physical and mental space in your own life:

  • Start your day with gentle self-massage to set a tone of spaciousness

  • Clear one small area of your home while being mindful of how it affects your mental state

  • Create a corner in your home that's intentionally minimal—a visual anchor for your mind to rest

  • Practice what I call the 'breath and clear' method: take three deep breaths before deciding what to keep or let go, whether it's physical items or commitments in your calendar

Remember, just as Marie Kondo asks us to keep only what sparks joy, we can apply this to our time and energy as well. Does this commitment bring you joy? Does this activity create spaciousness or constriction in your life?

Begin Your Journey to Spaciousness

As we wrap up our exploration of yoyū and spaciousness, I want to offer you a practical way to begin. While the concept of creating space in our lives might feel overwhelming, remember that it starts with small, intentional moments.

One of the most tangible ways I've found to cultivate this spaciousness is through gentle self-massage.

It's beautiful in its simplicity: just 5-10 minutes of intentional touch can create ripples of calm that extend far beyond the practice itself. When we give ourselves permission to pause, to breathe, to care for our bodies, we often find that this spaciousness naturally flows into other areas of our lives—our work becomes more focused, our relationships more present, our decisions more clear.

If you're curious to experience this for yourself, I invite you to explore our online library of self-massage videos. Each sequence is designed to help you create these pockets of peace in your day. You might want to start with our free 10-minute self-massage video—it's the perfect way to dip your toes into this practice without feeling overwhelmed.

As you begin this journey, remember that creating space isn't about perfection. It's about giving yourself permission to pause, to breathe, to simply be. Whether it's through a few minutes of self-massage, a moment of stillness with your morning tea, or an intentionally empty corner in your home, each small act of creating space is a gift to yourself.

What small space will you create for yourself today?



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Has this journal post been helpful for you?
If so, let me know in the comments.
To get started on your self-massage ritual, you can check out the kokoro salon online video gallery. Read more about my Bio here.
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